How We Choose at Our Everyday Crossroads

Whenever I’m about to share an idea with you in one of these blogs, I always ask myself, what’s the point? What is the intention of anything I write and publish? Who cares anyway?


The bottom line is that for me, the practice of self-examination and self-revelation is highly pragmatic, functional, and transformational. And, it can be really fun! If I can share my experience perhaps it will support others to be curious about who is inside all of the doings of their lives. And maybe, just maybe, it will bring some fulfillment, joy and fun to their lives. It doesn’t have to be hard!


For example, research has shown that 80% of our thoughts are negative in nature. And, research has shown that 90% of all diseases are stress related. It doesn’t take a psychologist to tell you that if you examine your thoughts and you see that if you think less negative thoughts, your stress level will go down. And, with that, perhaps much of the dis-ease you experience in your body will dissipate! That’s easy, right?


Personally, in my experience, the majority of my negative thinking does induce stress. So, if I want to thrive and be healthy, it makes sense to examine my thoughts and practice letting go of habitually thinking thoughts that aren’t really working in my favor. It doesn’t take a therapist or a coach, though they can be helpful. You and I can easily grow awareness of those thoughts that make us feel bad, sad or mad, and perhaps choose differently. I’m intending that this practice alone will keep me a lot happier and healthier.


Joseph Campbell said something like, if you see a path in front of you it isn’t yours—it’s someone else’s. Your own path begins where you stand and unfolds one step at a time.  No one else has ever walked your path. Since it’s your own path, and no one has ever been on it before, there is no precedent. You are creating it by yourself for yourself.


If you are open to considering the truth of these words, or if you know this to be true and you are practicing living into this yourself, you get how different this truth is from what our consensus view of reality tells us. It’s big work to question our choices. It’s big work to examine our motives and our actions. Is it worth it? Is it worth facing our worst fears and nightmares? Each of us has to come to that answer for ourselves.


Anita Moorjani, David Bennett, and thousands of individuals who have experienced Spiritually Transformative Experiences, which include Near-Death Experiences, agree with Joseph Campbell. In sharing their experience on the other side, they realized that life on Earth is a unique and precious experience for each and everyone of us. We are here to discover and embrace our own unique path—that road less traveled, as Scott Peck writes about.


Over the years, I’ve trained myself to take the road less traveled. As challenging as it has been, the surprises and miracles that arise are so worth it! More than that, my capacity for being strong and courageous in the face of only my worst fears, has grown my capacity to know myself to be safe with myself. It is actually truly rare that people feel safe with themselves. If it were true, we would have a lot more joy, love, kindness and playfulness with each other. I’m just sayin’.


If we look at living life from the perspective of our consensus view of reality, we see the path well-worn and littered with beliefs and judgements, which tell us to be afraid and to be in control, always. This is a path that most of us will walk – because we are told this is the only path there is. So many of us are afraid to stray from this path, and so we limit our awareness and our choice-making to only this.


The Dilemma—There’s Always a Dilemma

The way I coach, the way I live, the choices I make, is almost always self-directed, in alignment with something other than a consensus view of reality. At the same time, there is a part of me that wants to do it like other people do. I want to be like everyone else, having a sense of belonging and connection. I want to be normal!!! Truth is, there is no normal. We just make normal up!


I walked on the “tried and true” path for decades and I never felt comfortable in my own skin. What’s the point of being in my skin if I’m never feeling happy in it?


I don’t know about you, but the magnetic pull of my own intuition, which always feels like inspiration—as though I’m being guided by my higher-self, draws me back towards my own path. Sometimes it feels really uncomfortable. It is full of uncertainty and self-doubt, the fear of aloneness and isolation. I question whether I’m really hearing correctly, or maybe I’m making it all up. It is a dilemma!


Inevitably, I experience timely surprises and synchronicities, which confirm that I’m on track with my own path. Over time, it becomes easier to know the difference. As I know the difference I can choose to choose in alignment to what my heart wants, feeling the fears and dismissing them for now.


Here’s the deal – it’s scary to choose to follow the tried and true of your consensus reality. And it is scary to choose to walk your own path. Either way it is scary. Either way you are presented with life choices that reveal that you are at the crossroads of your awakening into self-empowerment.


Life is about standing in your own truth. It’s about standing in your knowing. It’s about standing in your courage, and walking on your path, being scared and alone—sometimes. It’s about training yourself to live in your knowing—that you are given the potentiality to live a life that is unprecedented. Life is about standing in the extraordinary, for no other reason than because you are!


I’m grateful that over the years my inner guru continually speaks to me in a way that I can hear. Even though I live alone, I can share with you that there is more conversation going on between me and my inner guru than if I were living with someone else. 


My inner guru gets me! She hears and sees me. And, when I listen to her, I feel heard, seen and gotten, more so than from any person on the planet. This can be another scary concept to consider for most people. Again, knowing what’s true for you, honoring your truth and respecting your truth will bring fulfillment to you in ways you may not have experienced.


So that’s it! I encourage you to be curious about how often you think about taking the alternative and less worn paths, but hold back from making that choice for fear of the risks and dangers that lurk—only in your imagination. 


There’s nothing to do differently. There are no choices to make. Just noticing how you are being at your everyday crossroads, how you choose what you choose will be a big enough adventure for you, until you are ready for more ease, more surprises, and more alignment with your inner guru.

I would love to hear your comments, questions and feedback.

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