New Years Resolution:
Stop Being Afraid You Will Be Found Out!
Here’s a great statistic: 99% of coaching clients find a lot of benefit from receiving coaching! That’s a big Wa-hooo for all of us!
No One Showed Up!
A couple of months ago, I shared with you the release of the Webinar: The 10 Essential Truths of Transformational Coaching. Part of the offering was a free call with me to talk about what you are wanting to build for yourself, personally and professionally. Guess what? Only one person took me up on this free offer. I find that fascinating!
When asked, a number of people who are successful coaches shared that, watching the webinar, they realized how little they really knew about coaching; that they felt overwhelmed with the idea of tapping into the deeper practice of what I’m calling the art of coaching. And they really weren’t ready to engage in the personal work required to bring more fulfillment to themselves and to their clients.
They mentioned that most coach trainings focus on what to do for the other person and very little dealing with their own personal presence. They balked at the offer of stepping into a more conscious training of personal growth, only in support of the people they serve. Trust me, when I say I totally get it!
Now, did thousands of individuals who watched the webinar experience this? I have no way of knowing. However, in my mentoring and supervision work with coaches, there is this concern of not being enough, not doing enough, and not being truly valuable to their clients. They share that there is a prevailing fear within them, which keeps them being anything but a relaxed and true presence for their clients.
So many of these individuals are highly trained and experienced, yet they believe they will be found out as a fake, a fraud, an imposter. They doubt their skills, talents and accomplishments. They live with a persistent internalized fear of being exposed.
I absolutely know this feeling; it’s called the Imposter Syndrome, Imposter Phenomenon, or Imposterism. There is a constant internalized fear and angst. For the past 20-plus years, it propelled me to always be in the question: “Am I enough?” This meant that I was always in self-doubt. It also meant that it was really difficult to truly empower my clients to be their most empowered-selves, for fear that they would no longer need me. This fear disconnected me from my highest intentions for my clients and myself.
Regardless of validation from clients and trainees, I kept on believing that I wasn’t enough. Until I just said: “STOP! ”
The Imposter Phenomenon
This way of living life and doing business creates an enormous amount of stress and anxiety that’s really quite unnecessary. It took me way longer than I imagined to rid myself of this nasty habit. Actually, it is an addiction to levels of cortisol and adrenaline. I needed to get sober.
The focus on how to relate to the external world so as to get what I wanted, never did create the sense of fulfillment and delight that I truly craved. I had to look at that—partly because I’m coaching my clients to look at that, and I mentor coaches to look at that! If I’m not looking at that—that doesn’t make me a fraud. It just means I’ve been afraid to look at that.
All of Us Coaches Have Fears
As coaches, our fears limit our capacities to truly serve our clients. And all of us coaches have fears! The degree to which we can surrender our fears, the greater the degree that our dreams of fulfillment will be realized. And your clients will tell friends and family just how awesome you are as a person and coach! You can stop being afraid of not being enough and not having enough!
The Opposite of Imposter: Self-Confident, Original, Authentic, Real and True
I don’t know about you, but I coach clients to be their most true and authentic self. I coach them to know their hearts’ desire and live a life free from fear, worry and stress. The more I let go of my habitual or addicted patterns of worry, stress and telling myself I’m not enough, the greater presence of being I bring to my clients. That enriches us both.
As I shared above, 99% of coaching clients are positively affected through coaching. So why change? I can’t answer that question for you. If you are happy and fulfilled with your life and business as it is—Hooray! Keep doing what you are doing. And, if there is an inkling of a possibility that you may want to be more peaceful and present with yourself and your clients, consider clicking one of the links below on any of my offerings:
Mastering the Art of Transformational Coaching: Dates To be announced
The ABC’s of Being Me: Dates to be announced
Group Coach Training – if you’re interested, email firstname.lastname@example.org
Bottom line, the more I grow myself personally, the more my business grows! How this works is that by letting go of what I’m afraid of, I’ve got so much more room for inspired, delightful fun! Exponentially, that grows me and my business! I’m just sayin’!!