responsibility Archives - The Paradigm Shifts

We’re All in This Together

Every one of us is most likely feeling the trauma of natural disasters, whether it is fire, flooding, high winds, or pandemic. None of us have immunity to being with what is occurring around the globe. Natural disasters, and the fear of them, are hugely destructive of what is priceless in your life–both the material things and your sense of peace and serenity. What do you have when everything is swept away? Survival hormones kick in. Fight, Flight, Freeze. And in these current times, there’s nowhere to go, nothing to do. So those hormones aren’t very helpful. We project blame

No Way-I’m Not Going!

I leave for Bali in a few weeks, and as the time draws nearer I find myself terrified of traveling to a part of the world that I’ve never been before. What comes to mind is "no." What comes to my whole being is an experience of fear and trauma. Part of me wants to back out! It’s too scary!!! I realize that I have a choice in this moment to avoid and ignore the sensations of fear and trauma, or I can explore the source of these sensations and fears. I’ve discovered over time, that to immerse myself in

The Anguish and Agony of Unrelenting Resistance

I have a client, Max, who in this moment finds himself in a life that is unmanageable. Regardless of where he is – at work, at home, in his truck driving between home and work – he is facing what feels like cataclysmic consequences. It is like he is attempting to walk through a field of land mines: whatever step he takes, regardless of the direction, it will inevitably result in a Ka-Boom! . . . . It is the end of pre-season for football. The athletes who have put their careers on the line to be chosen as one

Game Changers – They Happen When Least Expected

Sam is a 73 year old retired fellow, living in a two bedroom apartment in Houston. He is a veteran from the Viet Nam era, had a decent enough life with a couple of kids, an ex-wife, and a girlfriend of 25 years. Sam has been happy in his routines – stopping in at his local bank where he has coffee with some cronies. He visits with neighbors and participates in his community, as he has done for many decades. A longtime client of mine, James, in his mid 40’s, lives in Denver. He has four children, a wife he

Coming of Age “ Regardless of Age

One theme of Aging- Who Me? is that we are never not aging. We are never not developing, growing, unfolding, evolving. We are in fact in a constant state of emerging. As humans we are bombarded with choices, constantly. Some are big choices, some, not so big. For example, choosing the right college; choosing marriage or parenthood; choosing the “right career; choosing how to be with a partner or family member who’s harmful and abusive; choosing how to be with an incurable disease, choosing to come out of the closet in regard to their sexuality, their spirituality, or politics; choosing

The Inside of Grief

My dog, Gracie has quite a few jobs on our 10 acre parcel of land on Orcas Island. One, in particular, is to chase the rabbits away and keep them from eating all the flowers and plants around the property. Sometimes this also means that she digs into nests and pulls out little baby rabbits and kills them. This certainly keeps the bunny population down. And, it causes me incredible grief to see dead baby rabbits strewn across the yard. I’ve come to justify this as our “ mine and Gracie’s contribution to the circle of life. I take the

Who Do I know Myself to Be?

Let me first say that you are a rare indiÂvidÂual, indeed, to read a piece on spirÂiÂtuÂalÂizÂing your humanÂity. Maybe you didn’t know that’s what this artiÂcle is about. Now you do, and that makes you rare! We think about ourÂselves as spirÂiÂtual beings, yet more often than not we live our lives as if the oppoÂsite were true. Many of us say we believe in a Universal Source “ Oneness, who is always lovÂing and who always proÂvides for us in every way posÂsiÂble. Yet we often act from fear-based ideas, beliefs and interÂpreÂtaÂtions; the scarcity model. Though we

Not Losing

Yoda says "Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose." Wow! Think about what that would look like in the business world: Letting go of winning, power, promotions and bonuses; letting go of being right and other people being wrong; letting go of complaining, blaming and shaming; letting go of stress and worry and all of the underlying reasons for the stress and worry. What would you have left? Christopher is a Senior Director for a corporation in Atlanta. He’s been with the company just over two years and is extremely loyal and committed to the company’s

Every Choice-point Grows Leadership

Leaders aren’t made by titles, position, and prestige; they are made by the choices they make at points in their career, which in the moment seem to have nothing to do with becoming a leader. It has only to do with current situations throwing curve balls in their direction, requiring them to make choices that are in the highest good of the company and in their own highest good as well. Let’s say that the company you work for is challenged on many fronts. They are not fulfilling agreements made, which initially enticed you to join the organization. You still

O is for Obligation

One evening as I was laying in bed, preparing for a restful night of slumber, a voice from inside my head said: "I want to live my own life?" I was shocked with this outburst as I am one of the most independent individuals I know; I live a thousand miles away from my husband, on a secluded island off the coast of Washington; I work independently and live happily in my very solitary existence. What more is required for me to live my own life? I realized later, that though I live and work alone I carry many people

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